Wednesday, August 20, 2008

One More Lick at Lou

Shawn Goes for the Gold

Lu Shanzhen, coach for the Chinese Gymnasts called last night. He was a bit tuckered out from putting all the little car seats in his travel van for his "women" gymnasts.
Lu: This that smart aleck American woman?

C: Lou! Good to hear from you again. How's it going.

Lu: Not so good. I lose face from not winning lots more gold medals.

C: Why do you think that is?

Lu: I think your giant American gymnasts just show up better. Judges see them. Forget what little 40 lb Chinese Gymnast is doing.


Lu: Anyway we be back in four years. We'll show you then. Girls will be bigger and show up better on camera.

C: You're bringing the same girls back?

Lu: Sure. They have a long career ahead of them.

C: They'll be kind of old in 4 years, won't they?

Lu: Ha ha ha No they'll be 16. Olympics say must be at least 16, so I bring 16 girls next time. All 16.

C: I was kind of expecting to hear from your embassy after our previous conversations.

Lu: Ha ha ha. China very democratic now. They check you out, look at your blog. You just small potatoes. Small flea on a large dog. Tiny zit on the face of humanity. Little yellow duck in large bathtub, tiny fleck of rice......

C: Okay, okay. I get it. So, what are you going to be doing now?

Lu: I think I might go to Idaho, or Iowa or Indiana. I forget which one. Starts with "I" though. Got good coach there. He's in much demand now. Might need an assistant.

C: You forgot Illinois, but try Iowa. They've got a lot of corn there.

Lu: Look, I got to go. Girls all waiting in car seats. Got long ride ahead.

C: Well good luck with that. And, listen, don't be a stranger. You've got my number

Lu: Ha ha ha. I got your number all right.

C: And I got yours, Louie. I got yours.


Janeen said...


Lavinia said...

Hello little yellow duck! I like that!

Much better than tiny fleck of rice!

MuseSwings said...

Thanks ladies, I cracked myself up writing those. Oh - wait he really said that...right

Sweet Repose said...



Sandy said...

HAHAHAHAHAH. this was great...


MuseSwings said...

Sorry! Shawn, our gold medalist and her coach both live in Iowa.

Thank you again, and again Sandy for getting a laugh out of my blogette!