Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Layla's Dog Days of Summer




I'm Layla. I was an only dog. Just like in this picture. See any other dogs in the picture? Nope. Just Layla. I got alllllll of the attention, alllllll the treats and allllll the love alllllll to MYself. All the dog toys in the WHOLE house belonged just to Layla. It was MINE, MINE all Mine.
Then one day the people who give me stuff and sleep on my king sized bed like they own it say they have to go out for a while. They say it all sing songy which sounds stupid but I let them get away with it. I figure they're going to buy some Layla treats. So, I'm minding my own business, sleeping on MY king sized bed smack dab in the middle of the Dads pillow with MY Layla toys and MY chewey things sprinkled all around. And then I hear all the racket they make when they're coming home. And, get this, another dog shows up with the mom and dad! Lucy! She's all bouncy and wags her tail in my face. A big brown dog who wants to share. Share? I don't want to share. It's all MINE, all MINE. Lucy wants to play and be friends. Who wants to play with a giant brown dog who chews with her mouth open.


So here's a picture of the new dog, looking out MY window, standing in MY living room and spending time with MY family. She eats here, swims in Layla's pool, eats Layla's dog food, sleeps in front of Layla's TV, drinks Layla's water, goes outside and poops on Layla's lawn. Big poops. She plays with Layla's friends, and gets to lay in Layla's kitchen with the mom while dinner is cooking. I never do that. The mom makes too much noise and gets in my way.


If that's not bad enough, the first thing Lucy did was take MY personal private gingerbread boy. Here's a picture of her with it. She's got in her mouth all day long. She even jumped in the pool with it. What a dolt. It got all wet and and mushy and then it started to smell like a dead armadillo. Next thing you know, the Dad washed it in MY washing machine and dried it in MY dryer and now it's all clean and smells like mountains and lavender. Whatever the hell that means. And who does the Dad give it to when it's all fluffy and clean? Layla? No! He gives it to Lucy! Tch.
I just gotta say that this is a dog's life. I am really bummed out. So, okay, she can take my woobie, and some of my chewy stuff and jump around in front of me like a doofus trying to play with me, but guess what? I do not let her in MY bedroom. Ever. I make my teeth real big and make my eyes all squinty and mean. It works. She's such a pushover. So, Lucy has to sleep out in MY living room on MY new big dog bed that I decided to let her have. Plus, another thing I do is, I won't let her in MY office when the Mom is in there going clickety click on that thing she sits in front of. For hours. Like a zombie, when she could be holding me and giving me treats instead.
When Lucy tries to come in to MY office I do the big teeth thing and make my eyes all squinty and mean. It works. Here's a picture of me looking sad and forlorn. It looks like I'm an only dog in this picture. But there's another dog. She's standing next to the camera, jumping up and down like a doofus. She wants to play. The only thing I want to play is Make The Big Brown Dog Go Back Where Ever She Came From. That's what I want to play. Tch.

94 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, Layla! I am SOOOO sad for you! You poor, sweet, little Schnoodle dog you!! How could they do this to you? I am on your side! I agree with EVERYTHING you said and I encourage you to make more squinty-eyed, snarly-teeth faces at the brown, doofus interloper. Maybe she'll just magically disappear in a puff of smoke and the gingerbread woobie will fall to the floor. And it will be ALL YOURS, again, as it should be.
My sympathies, dear Layla.
Your favorite Aunt,
LoolyLouise

MuseSwings said...

Auntie Loolie, may I come and have a sleepover at your house? Will you bake me some dog cookies and let me play with Donald and Kevin's superheros?
I didn't tell Lucy I have a nice Aunt. I'm not sharing. She can get her own Aunt if she wants one.
XOX
Layla the Dog

steviewren said...

Poor Layla. It is so hard to be a big sister.

MuseSwings said...

It is! I was a big sister too. Actually the two are adapting very well to each other. They even play together.

Thank you for visiting!

sandy said...

ahhhhhh, man!!! It's a dog-eat-dog world out there and somebody is going to have to pay for this....I imagine.

Hoping that all works out for you and you get back all that attention. Maybe this Lucy will become a nuisance and be kept outside away from you.

But if not, she sure is cute, don't you think you could be able to just get along with her.

Kat Mortensen said...

Hi, I am breaking my rule of not posting today (post-storm night) because the advil has at last kicked in, I've watched an old episode of the O.C. (try it - your life will seem so much less complicated, trust me.)
I've just read a few of these posts and I have to say you are one funny lady! I just thought you were a smashing poet, but you are so much more!

This piece by Layla is really hilarious and you definitely nailed what's going on in her head. She's adorable, but Lucy is pretty darn cute too!

Thanks for saying you liked my "crap" poem.

Kat

MuseSwings said...

Sandy and Poetikat! Thank you for stopping by with comments. Layla appreciates all the wonderful support. She started playing with the new dog a few days ago, but just as I was typing this replay Layla was chasing Lucy out of my office. She giveth and she taketh away!
I do love your non-crap poem and your comments, Kat!

Cynthia

Lavinia said...

Hey Layla, life is tuff. Ya gotta be tuff, tuff like me---The Bebbers. I'm da Kind of Da Neighbourhood and I didn't get to be that way by laying belly up begging for a belly rub. (I only did that in my spare time).

Listen, Lucy doesn't look so bad, why don't you make her do useful things for you, like fetching and all that jazz?

As for me, I'm still king of da roost, as da cats in the backyard can tell ya. I'm not out there chasing them up fences for the sake of my health, ya know!!

A Wild Thing said...

Hey Layla...sounds like you need to hook up with me 'Bad Scratchy' and that other guy 'The Beebers'...I think we can fix your problem...do you chase mice?

Bad Scratchy (alias, NO SCRATCHY)

MuseSwings said...

LL and Sweet! I just saw your comments. What a hoot. Things are smoothing out a bit here for Layla, but I think she would appreciate teaming up with the Beebers and Bad Scratchy. She does chase mice and squirrels, so if youse guys don't mind, she'll hang out wit youse dogs of da block!

La Belle Mere said...

Aaaah poor layla. Cute pics.

happy SITS day.

x

Tania @ Larger Family Life said...

I might try the squinty eyed, big teeth thing on the kids.

Then again, perhaps not!

Tania (via SITS)

Angela said...

I want a dog so bad, and just seeing those pics makes me want one even more! If only my husband and I could agree on one! :)

Queenie Jeannie said...

So cute!!

Beth in NC said...

Awwwww. Coming over from SITS. This post is adorable. Ha. You probably wrote Layla's exact feelings. lol

JennyMac said...

I cracked up at that pic of the gingerbread boy being "stolen". LOL. Look at that face! Too cute.

Anonymous said...

Hi there, I'm stopping by from SITS to say hello. Cute post! :-)

The Silver Age Sara said...

Stopping by from SITS. Layla, I know you're going to love Lucy and soon she'll be your best bud.

mommytoalot said...

Awww poor Layla.
I bet you are enjoying Lucy's company now.
cheers,

Robin said...

LOL....

Poor Lyla....

Astrid in Bristling Acres said...

LOL!!!!

Happy SITS day!

Becky said...

Aww, poor Layla! It's so sad to suddenly have to share the attention - I know from when my brother was born 24 years ago!

Christie Y Brown said...

Congrats on your SITS day!

Unknown said...

This was so cute! Layla and my dog Butters should form a support group. He is not happy about having to share our attention with the baby.

Jamaican Bun in the Oven

Cher said...

hahaha!! soo funny. I love putting words in dogs mouths...I especially love the "tch" at the end. Perfect! :)

Anonymous said...

That is too funny! My dog could write something similiar but it would be about cats!

Ungirdled Passion said...

You gotta LOVE dogs! Great faces! Happy SITS!

B.o.B. said...

Whoa. Layla needs a hug. New baby jealousy strikes again!

Happy Sits Day!

confused homemaker said...

Layla I feel for you, it's hard going from an only to having someone come and take your toys.

Happy SITS Day!

Life of a Stepmama said...

Love this post!!! poor little Layla, she just can't help herself! My dog has the same problem and doesnt like her new sister who out weighs her by 62lbs!!! Dogs are the best!!

Sandy said...

Layla, give Rosey a call....she'll tell you how to handle the intruder.

said...

Oh Layla, I am so sorry for you. (((hugs)))

;o)

Congrats on your Mom's SITS feature day!

BonBon Rose Girls Kristin said...

Poor Layla. That Lucy has some nerve. Ah ha. Cutie cute pups!

Laura said...

It's funny how dogs can act just like little kids sometimes.

Elizabeth Patch said...

Happy SITS day!

Creative Junkie said...

This made me laugh! Totally love the perspective coming from Layla.

Anonymous said...

Visiting from SITS. This is so cute and funny! Love the pictures that "document" the story.

roadrunner201 said...

Cute post. I am sure my Daisy dog feels this way about the new baby!

Happy SITS day!

Erin said...

Happy SITS Day to you! Happy SITS day to you! Happy SITS Day, dear Cynthia! Happy SITS Day to you!

This was hilarious. Layla and Lucy are precious!

Rhiannon Bosse said...

oh man I know alla bout the multiple pet symdrome that some pets get hehe thats so cute! are they buddies now at least???

Lorie Shewbridge said...

This is the best post I have EVER read!! Seriously! I have an only dog, Nano the Yorkie, who is JUST like Layla. I can only imagine how he would react if we were to bring in another dog into the house. The pictures are adorable, especially the "forlorn". That's the look Nano gives when we go out and don't bring him with us.

You are an AMAZING writer, I cannot wait to read more! I'm so glad that SITS featured you today.

Lisa@saltandlightstudio said...

For the record Layla I am a doggy aficionado and I say you are TOPS, sure Lucy looks like a good cuddler but she also looks like she'd bruise my face with her wicked tail whip. I bet YOU'D even lick my face....Mmmmm...face licking...

BlogBaby (YUP a BABY who Blogs!)

Stacey said...

I feel sorry for Layla. My dog wouldn't be to happy if we brought another dog home!

Stopping by from SITS.

Magaly Guerrero said...

Oh poor Layla ;( I feel your pain. I was the baby for a long time--ten years to be exact. That was until my baby brother came along and all of the sudden I wasn't so cute anymore. Trust me, I didn't invite the little crying machine! My mom didn't pay that much attention to my essential needs anymore. Was there ice cream for me? No. What about cut up mangoes? No! The little crying machine got it all. But soon I started liking him a whole lot and now we play well together. Actually, I make him do things because I'm the big sister and that makes me happy. Hopefully you can find your happy medium too ;)

the planet of janet said...

well! how would you feel if your husband brought home another wife to keep *you* company!!!!

*snicker*

Unknown said...

Poor Layla looking all forlorn. I bet they'll be best buds in no time!
Happy SITS day!

Dawn said...

This is such a cute post!

Denise Grover Swank said...

How cute! Poor Layla. My Yorkie Fifi can totally relate-- she got a new "sister" this past winter. Maybe Fifi and Layla could be cyber friends and start blog or forum for dogs who have been displaced.

Culture Girl said...

Awww, poor baby. It's really tough when you get a new family member. My kitties could have written this post about our new dog. We're thinking of getting another one too, so should I take Layla's post as a warning? I sure hope things get better for her.

piecemeal people said...

Yikes...I have to say, you've succeeded in actually making me feel sorry for that dog!

Becky @ Babes in Hairland said...

Poor Layla! Despite not having animals this is hilarious! Love that she won't let Lucy in HER bedroom, etc. Too funny. I think my kids have felt the same way as I brought home a new baby sometimes! :) Enjoy your day in the SITS spotlight.

Marketing Mama said...

Stopping by from SITS. I would feel awful about the chewy toy... hope your pups are getting along better and better each day. :)

Anonymous said...

Poor Layla...at least "The Other" understands your body language!

Robbie S. Redmon, LPC said...

Poor Baby! Happy SITS Day!

Sarah said...

Haha! That's what my cat would do if we got another one!

Mariel said...

Heart-wrenching!

Fabulous writing!

Mariel
www.oneshetwoshe.com

Amy said...

What a fun perspective! I love it!

Stereos and Souffles said...

What a great post, love the dogs point of view.

Peyton said...

Poor Layla! I have a Lucy too... she is an only dog most of the time, but when we visit my mom, she makes my mom's dog Cash feel like Layla!

Happy SITS day!

Lisa Anne said...

Such cute photos.

Happy FB day.

Jillian said...

Oh how I miss living with a dog... at least Layla lets Lucy play with some of her things!

Happy SITS day!

Stephanie said...

We don't have dogs, but we do have a cat that thinks she's a dog and was similarly displaced and offended when we brought home our first child. Go figure!

Congrats on FB day!

Just Me said...

oh poor Layla, my cat shadow can give you some tips on how to get rid of unwanted visitors?!!!

Patricia said...

awww poor layla. I guess that's the same way the kids feel when we bring home a new baby *L*


Happy SITS day!

Brandy said...

Poor Layla! It's hard to be an only dog for so long and then get a playmate.

Cynthia said...

That is just so cute. My dog Lola says to tell Layla and Lucy hello. She finally won over her cousin Wally but it took awhile.

http://www.ashimmyinmyspirit.com/search/label/Lola

Holly @ Domestic Dork said...

Love it! {poor Layla}

I especially like the bit about being a zombie in front of the computer. I can relate.

brokenteepee said...

I know how you feel. They keep adding new goats around here...

Happy SITS day.

Leigh said...

Very cute! Love that last picture!

Anonymous said...

Too cute!!!! <3

Brandy@YDK said...

oooooh poor layla.

happy sits day!

Eve said...

Oh, the poor dear little Layla! What were the mom and the dad thinking?? Who would want a doofus big, brown dog hanging around (even if he is ADORABLE)??? ;)

Anonymous said...

This is just too cute!

Happy FB on SITS Day!

shortmama said...

Poor Layla! (Thats my youngest daughters name by the way!)

Anonymous said...

Poor Layla! :)

Kristen said...

Lucy better watch her back.

AdriansCrazyLife said...

Oh poor Layla! That's exactly how my 16 year old cat Nike felt when I brought home TWO, count them TWO six-week old kittens. But now they all love each other, at least most of the time. Especially at nap time. It's like they can fuss and feud at each other all day, but when it's nap time, all bets are off. Funny critters!

Frugal New England Kitchen said...

What a cute post! I have a granddog - Happy SITS day!

Ryan Ashley Scott said...

This is hysterical. I feel for Layla - I had two younger siblings. ;)

Unknown said...

Hahahaha I LOVE this post! I'm sure my dogs think the same dang thing (we have 5). When we got the second rescue the first one was ticked at me for a year.

Anonymous said...

Poor Layla, hahahaha...what cuties!

Jamie :)

Anonymous said...

I would recommend stealing the new dogs toys.

lynn said...

What a cute post, love it!

Happy SITS day :)

Just Lisa said...

Ah! Poor Layla!

supahmommy- somethin's wrong with that girl said...

That is too cute. ..lol

Chaya Bluma said...

I love talking dogs! They're so much more compelling than those talking cats. Poor Layla! Just play her some Eric Clapton and tell her the song is about her.

Lamonica said...

Cute post and pictures. I enjoyed reading it.

Stopping by from SITS

Lisa M said...

poor layla! lol You have some cute doggies :)
Happy SITS Day!

mamammelloves said...

Cute post! Both of your dogs are so cute! I'm sure my dog could relate to Layla's woes... We got a new puppy about a year after we got her! We just wanted her to have a friend. :)

crunkyjens said...

Oh poor Layla, how dare they give someone else your Gingerbread man!! At least you are standing your ground with the bedroom. You go Layla! :)

Amanda @ Serenity Now said...

This sounds like what happened to my oldest daughter when we brought home the new baby. ;)

Amy said...

LOL!!! Oh man, that's pretty much what Dingo did when we brought Rocky home. Rocky would very much like to be an alpha dog, but Dingo just rolls his eyes and says, "Whatev's... I know who's boss... ME!!!"

Unknown said...

This is one of the cutest blog posts I've ever read! I feel for Layla. It is very hard to be the big sister. But eventually, you can become best friends with the little sister, like I did!

Happy SITS day!

Lynn said...

Hooray! I have discovered you!
I always check out the SITS spotlighted person and you are the first one I have decided to follow.
(Must be the lack of babies mentioned or the plus of puppy dogs)