The Mystery of the Ladies Room

As I mentioned yesterday, I took a poll of several men, asking them why baseball players spit so much. Still don't know, but I, in turn, was asked the question of the ages: Why do women go to the ladies room in groups. "What's it to you", is the most logical answer, but I thought I'd put this oft queried mystery up for discussion.

I got several good answers yesterday, including this excellent response from Debby:

"I go to the bathroom with other women because then you've got help if you're stuck in a stall with no TP. Or, like Stevie says, the door doesn't lock. Or Grin Slickens is there. Or Lavinia is waiting for you to hang your purse on the hook so she can nab some new, un-maxed credit cards...any one of those reasons, all of those reasons, take your pick."

We're heeeeerree!

Before I continue on, if you did not visit Debby's blog, Life's Funny Like That yesterday, do it NOW! Debby, God bless her, has some spectacular news to share! Check it out and then come right back so we can discuss the ladies room question.


You back now? Okay, lets get started.

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Going to the ladies room in groups began with Eve - once she had enough girls in the family. It was first and foremost a safety issue since all activities took place outdoors, in the woods, in the dark. There were lions and tigers and bears and men. The danger potential quotient of each of these to a lone woman in a vulnerable, defenseless, half mast position is not necessarily in the order listed.
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The concept of a group poop continued when outhouses became the established mode of elimination - the buildings were small and flimsy and dark and outside. All of dangers listed above were still viable safety issues. Besides, while you are trying to do everything including manage your skirts and petticoats how are you going to tear pages out of the Sears catalogue all by yourself?

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In Victorian times, the men would repair to the library for cigars and cognac for the sole purpose that it would never be necessary for a woman to have to state, in their company, that she must repair to the loo to take a pee. As soon as the men were out of sight the women would dash, en mass to uhm powder their noses.
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This camaraderie among women got to be a habit and since any one of a thousand things can go wrong in a ladies room, it is always helpful to have seven to ten women tag along with you. Perhaps a stuck zipper, a popped button, a missing roll of tp. Sometimes you may need something that is not available to you in the little stall. It is so much more convenient to pass a quarter under the door than it is to completely redress and make a mad dash to little vending machine.

Guys - this is what a typical ladies room looks like.

We have plants, lamps, upholstered chairs, mirrors aplenty, lovely counter tops

As opposed to your typical men's room

There is still the ever present danger of a masher lurking near the entrance of the Ladies Room. And, imagine, sitting there quietly in your stall contemplating whether to continue your evening with that dud of a date, or leave by the back door. You look down and see a pair of men's shoes outside the door. Having 20 to thirty women in the ladies room with you will eliminate this problem altogether. He'll wind up in the trash canister under a mound of half used cotton balls before you even know what all the excitement was about out there by the beautifully appointed wash basins.

Grin Slickens could be lurking nearby!

In groups, we are assured that we have everything in order before returning to the dinner table. Comments like "what were you thinking when you bought that lipstick shade", and "is that a wig or your real hair?" will keep you ever alert to a beauty faux pas or having a long string of tp stuck to your shoe, or your skirt tucked into your knickers.

You can get everything properly adjusted

Have a group discussion about your dog of a date.

And, of course, having 45 - 60 others with you will encourage you to participate in round table discussions - along with pie charts and ad hoc committees - about your date.

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Your comments questions and historical facts regarding group visits to the ladies room are encouraged! Had any ladies room experiences that you care to mention? Have at it!

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And don't forget to flush.