Friday, December 19, 2008

Q: Do I Smell Cookies Baking? A: Nope.

So what if she didn't make snicker doodles, you pedantrious prunes! Now see what you have done!




You don't really believe I made these, do you?

A conversation with my semi-guilty conscience:

Guilty Conscience: Sooooo, Muse, Just how many Christmas cookies have you made this year?

Muse Swings: Zip, nada, zilch.

GC: (While making my left eye twitch) Are you planning on baking?

MS: I'm thinking about it.

GC: Just what are you thinking about?

MS: I'm thinking about crashing a cookie exchange.

GC: I see you have a grocery list with some potential cookie ingredients listed.

MS: Yes, it's a bit optimistic of me.

GC: And you are planning on going to Publix, when?

MS: Tomorrow, I guess.

GC: I'd suggest you at least set the alarm. Otherwise by the time you show up the sugar and flour aisles will be as empty as your cookie jar.

MS:

GC: And what about those teeny little gingersnaps you used to make by the thousands? I haven't seen one of those in 17 years.

MS: It's the humidity in Florida. They puff up - no crunch.

GC: And the problem with that is?

MS: That's the whole point of the cookies. The crunch.

GC: I saw you thumbing through a recipe book at the check out counter the other day. The recipes all call for that pre-made sugar cookie dough. Where are your morals? Your pride?

MS: Look, I've been semi-super Christmas Mom for 40 years. My priorities have changed.

GC: So, what exactly are your priorities?

MS: I don't really have any right now. I'm good with that. Actually, I'm wallowing in it.

GC: Do you think Santa will be "good with" not having a plate of cookies waiting for him this year?

MS: Who sez he won't get cookies? I still have a box of Girl Scout Thin Mints in the freezer. Those things are like gold this time of year.

19 comments:

steviewren said...

Mmmmm, Girl Scout Thin Mints....my faves!

The way I look at the no bake-cookie-debacle is that if I don't bake em, I can't eat em. And any calories I can eliminate from my diet is is okay with me.

Martha said...

Oh, Thin Mints in the Freezer, Yummers! Santa is a lucky Elf! I have all the ingredients for cookies waiting for me, they are going to have a little while longer.

Debby said...

GC - Shut up, you nag.

JANE said...

OMG, that just reminded me, I have some in the freezer also, LOL!!!! You always crack me up, thanks!!

MuseSwings said...

That's a good point Stevie! I'll tell them I'm looking out for their health!

We still have 5 days, Martha - or 4 if we have to show up someplace on Christmas eve with cookies.

I like your attituce Debbie!

Jane - save those cookies until January and then sell 'em on e-bay. You'll make a killing.

JANE said...

Muse I enjoy reading you so much I left you something tonight on my blog!!

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

Santa needs to lose a few. I say leave him a carrot and some melba toast. Do they still have melba toast?

MuseSwings said...

Thank you so much Jane! I love it! I happened by your place before I saw this message.

You're right about Santa, NanGIP - Hahaha: Melba toast! I'll check the aisles while I'm staggering through Publix tomorrow.

Blicky Kitty said...

Yummy would love to swap recipes after my frenzied weekend of shopping and baking. I need a better ginger snap recipe.... Im going to try Willows chocolate chips too.

There's a present for you under the Blinky tree Cynthia!

nanaflood said...

Me for one, haven't had those ginger snap cookies in 17 years, and you always use the humidity excuse..lol for not making them..Sometimes gooy cookies are great. I have baked more cookies this year that I can count, even the meringue ones who seem to lose their crunch between the cooling process and the storage in that air tight container. They seem to disappear no matter if they have a crunch or not. If you are bringing cookies on Christmas day, I can detect homemade or store bought, so be aware of that...lol. Found the best recipes for cookies, etc., made with the store bought tube o'cookie dough. Wonderful cookies. So, fire up that oven and bake away there lady. Luv ya

Janet

Janeen said...

I start my 2 week vacation today~ Yahoo!

And.... today I begin getting all the dough done with my handy Kitchen Aid! Years ago I started this because it is easy to get overwhelmed before I even began. I do all the different doughs, wrap them up in plastic wrap and into the refrigerator they go. A few days later, I pull out a block of dough and I'm ready to roll, cut and bake! Then I'm not completely exhausted after a few hours. It's more fun because it seems like less work done in one day.

MuseSwings said...

Blick! I'll send you my gingersnap recipe - you'll love them! Thank you for the wonderful gift and most especially for giving the rolling stones to Nan and not me.

Janet - will you be able to detect invisible cookies? Those are the easiest to make. I'll bring a giant plate of those over on Christmas.

Aunt Jo said...

I burned my last batch of gingerbread cookies. I had no idea they were so hard to roll out!! UJ swears they are supposed to be soft, but you say crunchy....who is right?

I have a killer recipe for Snickerdoodles. I love them!

Yaya said...

LOVE your internal dialogue with yourself! Glad I'm not the only one that does that! Lol!

You know, I'm the same way this year. Every other year I've knitted scarves for EVERYONE and their mothers and dogs, and this year I can't even finish ONE. I keep picking it up to work on and I get a row done and I'm just not interested....what is going on?

MuseSwings said...

Everyone is right - there are zillions of recipes for gingerbread cookies and some are meant to be crunch and some soft. I'm posting my recipe for you today!

MuseSwings said...

Janeen - That's exactly what I do - make all the dough ahead of time. As it happens I just finished making 4 kinds of cookie dough. I'll bake them tomorrow and Monday. I'm also making chocolate dipped apricots for church on Christmas eve and peppermint fondant - my son's favorite. Yummy stuff!

Devoted said...

LOL! I love those thin mints! I buy a case each year...YUM. I am heading to the grocery store tomorrow to pick up supplies for my Christmas cookies...I'm grabbing the stuff for your 'snaps' I might just call them Muse Snaps! :-D Thanks for the destructions on how to make them. Merry Christmas!

MuseSwings said...

WonderfuL I know you and your family will enjoy them. Let me know how they turn out!

Sandy said...

hahaha...fun to read....your GC sounds like mine...and your rationale sounds like mine too!

I may bake but I'm not sure. Because if I bake I eat...and I don't want to pack on the pounds I lost in the last six months.