Daily Road Closures Due To Zombies

The Department of Transportation in Illinois is up in arms because pranksters (their word) in the Collinsville area are hacking road signs to warn drivers that the end is near (as if we didn't know) and to Take Caution Zombies Ahead.

It's all well and good that the original intent of the road signs was to let drivers know that the IDT is working on potholes, but I feel the Zombie problem is far more important. Dancing around the issue by striking out at the hackers, rather than dealing with the Zombies is a very shortsighted way managing the situation.

To suggest that these folks in downtown Collinsville should try to be neater while enjoying ketchup on their fries at the local McDonald's is a farce.

Rise up Collinsville! Bar your windows, stock up on food, and for heavens sake don't go out alone at night.

Public Service Announcement:

Speaking of things that go bump in the night, I have stated several times to the Mister that there are an awful lot of criminals out there with the middle name of Wayne - prime example, John Wayne Gacy, Jr. The Mister generally rolls his eyes and continues flipping news channels. But really, any time a particularly nasty crime is committed the odds are the guy's middle name is Wayne.

Don't be blamin' me, Missy, I told ya not ta name him Wayne. I told ya ta name him Pilgrim.

While surfing the net today I came up with several websites that have come up with this very same conclusion. Within minutes I came up with a list of 350 violent criminals (here's my list) with the middle name of Wayne . Their crimes range from serial killings to sadistic murder, rape, kidnapping and combinations of the above. Let this just serve as a warning not to give your child the middle name of Wayne. Check middle names before dating men, have your daughters and female friends do the same. Don't name your dog Wayne, and for heaven's sake don't associate with Zombies with the first, middle or last name Wayne.

What do you suppose it is about the name Wayne that sets these men off? Suggestions here? Know anyone with the Wayne middle name? Are you going to hang out with them anymore?